LIFE WITH MOM - the big flood

Well. I was working on some photo galleries and client logos, and preparing to start a new client website. Busy day. Phone rang. "hello?" "DINA...I NEED YOUR HELP. NOW". So I dropped everything and grabbed all of my stuff, camera and computer...and an overnight bag. "I will be there in one hour".

You see, I go to my mom's house every week and spend 2 days with her. I started this tradition right after my dad died. Her partner of 56 years. This was not the day I intended to do this...but the desperation in my mother's voice changed the schedule for me. Guess I will see what I can do for her, and spend the night as well.

I jumped into the big red truck. I take the big red truck because ever since I spent over 3 months sleeping in the house while dad was "in transition"...ever since he took his last breath...I just cannot sleep downstairs alone. Too many eyes. Too much energy. Too hard to explain. SO...I sleep in the big red truck. Yup. That's right. It has a big ole camper shell...great bed...I just back it right up to the front door and...sleep in the big red truck.

It is much more "quiet" out there.

So I am jammin on the 55 mile drive to mom's. I call her on the speakerphone. "What is going on, mom? What is wrong?" You see...just a few days earlier mom's house flooded. I thought it had something to do with that. My bro was at the house fixing a broken pipe. He turned off the Main. My mom was being visited by my sister. They were going to go to target to do a little "nick-nack-really-do-not-need-it-but-buy-it-anyway kind of shopping. You know...buy that stuff that sings "bling-bling" but once you get it home it sits in a bag on the living room chair for longer than it should. Well. Anyway. My bro (pete) says "DO NOT turn on the water. I need to go to Lowes and get a new pipe. I turned off the MAIN. I will be back in a couple of hours". Lisa (my sis) says "Oh don't worry. We are going to TARGET (eyes aglow in imagined treasures) and won'tbe back for a couple of hours" "cool". "Yeah...cool". So Pete goes North. Lisa and Mom go south. The house sits and waits in anticipation of a new pipe and the bling bling bags that will sit on the living room chair for too long.

Scene in the front yard. Take ONE. Lisa and her daughter, Jess, and my mom pull up to the house...tingling with the excitement of the TARGET experience. They all exit the car. Go to the front door. "got your key, Ma?". "No...I thought YOU had it." "Well, where is the 'hidden' key?" "I do not keep it out anymore...". "So- we are locked out?" No, Pete has a key and he will be back soon...let's just sit out here. It's so nice out anyway." "Mom...(says little Jess)...can I water the lawn?" "Oh yeah...(Says my sis, Lisa) let me turn on the MAIN so you can water the lawn...."

20 minutes later...Pete pulls into the driveway and gets out of the car...to see mom and lisa hoisting little jess into a window that they had pried open. Water running out from under the front door. He stands in the driveway. New pipe in one hand. Mouth wide open. Front door spare key in pocket...the rest is history.

So I am jammin out in the red truck...mom on the speakerphone. This is the day after the "fric and frac bling-bling target twins" incident. "Mom...I am on the freeway...what is wrong?" and in a breathy response with a slight new jersey accent, she says "well...the guys that suck up water and dry out the house are on their way over...so I was trying to clean the pile of stuff in daddy's closet cuz it is all wet...and I fell over into the closet and now I can't get out...". Silence from the big red truck. "what did you just say?" "I fell into daddy's closet and I can't get up..." Image flash from the driver of the big red truck. My dad...looking down onto mom's ass as it sticks out of his closet. He is all glowy..and young and with big, bright, twinkling blue, blue eyes. Looking down on the woman he loves from the great beyond...laughing his ass off.

"Mom...did you say you have fallen and you can't get up?" (are you thinking what I am thinking...what was that silly ass commercial?). Breathy answer "Yes..."

Well...it all worked out. I pulled up to find big green machines running all over the house. Drying it all up. Mom was sitting in the overstuffed livingroom chair. Hair sticking up. Glow in her cheeks. She is a very good looking woman for 75...a real looker. "Mom?" "Oh...Dina...thank God you are here..." "Did the guys with the big green machines pull you out of the closet?" "NO...but I can't even explain to you how I got out of there...Wanna go for lunch? I'll buy..."

I love my mom. We had fun that day. And the new carpet should look great! But...I told her to let ME clean out the closets...safer that way...